Parents! Meet Absalom: The Mutinous Bolshie Son of King David

By Lukanga Samuel

Absalom, the third son of King David by his wife Maacah, seemed to have everything going for him, but like other tragic figures in the Bible, he attempted to take what was not his.

Absalom’s story is one of pride and greed, about a man who tried to overthrow the plan of God. His ambition and rebellion against his father not only led to his own demise but also brought turmoil to the kingdom of Israel. Interestingly, Absalom was known for his extraordinary good looks and luxurious hair, which he cut only once a year; this very hair ultimately contributed to his death.

The Bible says Absalom was praised as the most handsome man in all of Israel: “He was flawless from head to foot.” (2 Samuel 14:25) When he cut his hair once a year—only because it became too heavy—it weighed five pounds. It seemed everyone loved him.

Absalom had a beautiful sister named Tamar, who was a virgin. Another of David’s sons, Amnon, was their half-brother. Amnon fell in love with Tamar, raped her, then rejected her in disgrace.

For two years Absalom kept silent, sheltering Tamar in his home. He had expected his father David to punish Amnon for his act. When David did nothing, Absalom’s rage and anger seethed into a vengeful plot.

One day Absalom invited all the king’s sons to a sheep-shearing festival. When Amnon was celebrating, Absalom ordered his soldiers to kill him.

After the assassination, Absalom fled to Geshur, northeast of the Sea of Galilee, to the house of his grandfather. He hid there for three years. David missed his son deeply. The Bible says in 2 Samuel 13:37 that David “mourned for his son day after day.” Finally, David allowed him to come back to Jerusalem.

Gradually, Absalom began to undermine King David, usurping his authority and speaking against him to the people. Under the pretense of honoring a vow, Absalom went to Hebron and began to gather an army. He sent messengers throughout the land, proclaiming his kingship.

When King David learned of the rebellion, he and his followers fled Jerusalem. Meanwhile, Absalom took advice from his counselors on the best way to defeat his father. Before the battle, David ordered his troops not to harm Absalom. The two armies clashed at Ephraim, in a large oak forest. Twenty thousand men fell that day. The army of David prevailed.

As Absalom was riding his mule under a tree, his hair got entangled in the branches. The mule ran off, leaving Absalom hanging in the air, helpless. Joab, one of David’s generals, took three javelins and thrust them into Absalom’s heart. Then ten of Joab’s armor-bearers circled Absalom and killed him.

To his generals’ surprise, David was heartbroken over the death of his son, the man who tried to kill him and steal his throne. He loved Absalom dearly. David’s grief showed the depth of a father’s love over the loss of a son as well as regret for his personal failures that led to many family and national tragedies.

For a person who does not read the Bible, these episodes raise disturbing questions. Did Absalom murder Amnon because David had failed to punish him? The Bible does not give specific answers, but when David was an old man, his son Adonijah rebelled in the same way Absalom had. Solomon had Adonijah killed and executed other traitors to make his own reign secure.

The name Absalom means “father of peace,” but this father did not live up to his name. He had one daughter and three sons, all of whom died at an early age (2 Samuel 14:27; 2 Samuel 18:18).

Absalom was charismatic and easily drew other people to him. He possessed some leadership qualities.
He took justice into his own hands by murdering his half-brother Amnon. Then he followed unwise counsel, rebelled against his father, and tried to steal David’s kingdom.

Absalom imitated his father’s weaknesses instead of his strengths. He allowed selfishness to rule him, instead of God’s law. When he tried to oppose God’s plan and unseat the rightful king, destruction came upon him.

The most interesting biblical references of this story are when Absalom sent secret messengers throughout the tribes of Israel to say, “As soon as you hear the sound of the trumpets, then say, ‘Absalom is king in Hebron.’”—2 Samuel 15:10

And also when the king was shaken. He went up to the room over the gateway and wept. As he went, he said: “O my son Absalom! My son, my son Absalom! If only I had died instead of you—O Absalom, my son, my son!”—2 Samuel 18:33

There is so much to learn about the life of Absalom. We learn how to respond when we are wronged, when we see injustice, when people wrong us. We need to pray for those who have authority over us. Although we may not always agree with their decisions, we need to bestow honour upon them.

The story of Absalom from the Bible teaches valuable life lessons about the dangers of unchecked ambition, the destructive power of pride, the importance of healthy family dynamics, the need for forgiveness, and the consequences of betrayal, highlighting how even seemingly positive traits can be twisted into harmful actions when not guided by morality and humility.

Absalom’s physical beauty and charming demeanor masked his inner turmoil and malicious intentions, highlighting the danger of judging people solely based on outward appearances.
His arrogance and self-centeredness prevented him from seeing the destructive path he was on, illustrating how pride can blind individuals to their own flaws and lead to disastrous choices.

David’s favoritism towards other sons likely contributed to Absalom’s bitterness, emphasizing the need for fair treatment and open communication within families to prevent resentment.
Absalom’s desire for power, fueled by resentment and a sense of entitlement, led him to rebel against his own father, demonstrating how unchecked ambition can lead to devastating consequences.

Despite Absalom’s treachery, King David’s deep love for his son is shown through his grief and willingness to forgive, highlighting the importance of forgiveness even in the face of great wrong.
Absalom’s failure to listen to sound advice from those around him contributed to his downfall, emphasizing the importance of seeking wise counsel when making significant decisions.

So to parents, you need to be sensitive to your children’s feelings, sensitive to how your words and actions can impact their feelings. You need to make time for them, affirm, encourage, and pray for them to grow in the knowledge and the fear of the Lord.

For God and My Country, Africa! (lukangasamuel55@gmail.com / +256 785 717379)

Lukanga Samuel is an Adventist, Ambassador of Humanity and a social development enthusiast from Nakaseke District.